Good morning, Happy McBlog. The Earth says Hello!

After carefully reading my last blog I've decided to leave this one on a more positive note. So here's some negative facts before I go on.

My brother has chicken pox.

I have a bright yellow bike with red and yellow tassels hanging off the handlebars.

I've got a college induction day tomorrow and I'm scared that someone will punch me in the sunburn.

Apollo Justice is related to Trucy Wright?!?! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!

I fell over whilst doing a three-legged race (invented by immigrants) and hurt my ankle.

England lost to Germany 2-4. Not ONE. TWO. Incompetent fucking referees. Now they're out of the world cup. Great one you slaag.

Now for some good things.

I made a Twitter list!

My IQ is 118, and I'm only 15.

I don't go to school.

When David Cameron went to Oxford, he liked the Smiths. I like the Smiths! We are perfect for eachother.

Apparently Primark do the shoes I want for £8 instead of £25. WAAAAAAAAAAAY.

John James off Big Brother FINALLY took his shirt off for the cameras yesterday.

Genetically Modified cocks and the budget cuts.

Just thought I'd blog about someone writing on my exam desk.

Grant Moir <----GM COCK

Why do people never write WAS on exam desks? It's always WOZ or WAZ.

Not hard. W - A - S.

Anyway.

Daddy Dearest told me about the Con-Lib budget cuts over dinner. They've made some pretty good decisions I think. And so does my Conservative detesting father.

A freeze on council tax for the next 2 years.

Yes! I won't have to pay (much) for money theiving chavs to dress their children like they've got no GCSE's. Or pay for lower class messes to dye their hair with MORE and MORE vimto. (It doesn't stop! Vimto does not want to be put on your skanky, uneducated, ugly fat head, dear.

Everyone in the universe should boycott Claire's Accessories. Including little alien lives on Mars.

Yes they should. Claire's Accessories earrings made my ear piercing hole go black, which is so disgusting. When I was trying (and succeeding) to get the horrific GUNK out of my ear, I realised that I have TINY ears. People have mentioned this before but I thought they were just trying to get a reaction out of me.

They are actually tiny. SIX CENTIMETRES. I think that's pretty small for an ear? I'm not sure.

This was the most pointless blog ever.

#rant. We're Alice's school and we...

Didn't let her have pink OR blonde OR black and blonde hair, because it was INAPPROPRIATE. The colour of my hair does NOT reflect my schoolwork (although, ironically, it was when I dyed my hair brown that my excellent work started its long descent into D grade), it affected others as they got distracted. Bully for them.

Make her go REALLY cold in winter, as we like to take students' cardigans and hoodies and jumpers and make them FREEZE so we can see their shivery little forms and cackle while wearing our M&S jumpers and drinking Earl Gray tea. (Okay, so they probably DIDN'T do that, but they are MASSIVE DICKS.)

Employ George Lamb wannabees specifically to piss off Alice Scott as we want to get her excited about education on the LAST year and then she can cry because she never ever got to steal Mr Sharpes shoes even though they would be far too big for her as she has weeny lickle feet (size 3) but would still fetch a good price from a indie twerp buying them off ebay. -breeeathe-

Take away the ONLY hottest employed teacher (Mr Warren) who looked like a apprentice star and Rav Wilding mixed up, and who fondly called me and Mannon cunt "The Hair Bear Bunch", how sweet. We did this to keep her going to school, and never gave her a taught lesson by him.

Put on Alice's exam timetable that she has an exam on this day, but secretly it's so she'll exercise and get skinny because we're sick of the school getting smashed each morning when she rolls (usually late) into school. Instead, she didn't have an exam, but it was funny knowing that she had to walk there and back and even went to a revision session in the morning.

I think more people should read my blog and follow me on Twitter. Here's why;

I am quite interesting. My tweets are never all about the same thing. Except exams, because they're hard and wasting all my time at the moment. ( If you're on twitter, follow @allyscallywag ) ;)

Because I take pictures and I am a photography enthusiast, which means if you follow me on Twitter, I will be more inclined to give you discounts at your wedding if you pick me as the photographer! Simples.

I am a Conservative supporter and keep up to date with the news, and then I give my own sarcastic view of it. It's better than watching some old drone go on and oooonnnnn about the BP oil spill. I care about it, I think it's terrible, but it's not England's problem and they should spend more time talking about the world cup. Which is more important.

I read a LOT, so if your a small author with a small published book which is unknown, I will KNOW about it if you follow me. It's a win-win situation.

If you are some creepy stalker, then you can read ALL about my journeys to different places and follow me there! That's the worst reason ever.

I just think you all should follow me because I want to have more followers than Daryl. He'll never know of this plan, because no-one reads these bloggy-wog-wogs anyway.

The birthday of my blog.

Well, I highly doubt any interesting, entertaining or even remotely alive people will view this, but I needed a website, besides my ancient MySpace, to put on my Twitter website details. However, I may give this a shot, as it will document my very uninteresting days, so I may read it in later life and chuckle at how young I was.